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How to love your natural hair

Since the natural hair movement started, many people go into it without research. At the end of the day, they go back to relaxers because they think:
  • My hair is too tough to maintain
  • It's ugly
  • I don’t have time

My clap backs to these excuses are: 
  • a little research will teach you how to maintain your hair
  • natural hair is beautiful, you have to expand your definition of beauty to be broader than the established European standards of beauty
  • There are so many lazy naturalistas, there is a club for us.
The natural hair that grows out of our head is not meant to be a political statement but the unfortunate truth is, it is. It is a big f$%k you to the system that constantly says anything associated with being black will never be good enough. Although there is nothing wrong with rocking bundles, wigs, and extensions, we all love to change and switch things up. The problem lies when natural hair is shamed and deemed as “ugly”, “unprofessional” and “not-classy” because it is not straight and “tamed” like we are told it should be.

January 2015
For many of us, we did not have a say when it was time to relax our hair, we may have even been excited to get rid of the “burden” on our head. I don’t also blame anybody for this because black women were not given the opportunity to love and rock their hair in the professional setting hence, they don’t have a lot of experience caring for it. Since the ridiculousness of choosing "Caucasian standard of beauty" is dying day after day and the definition of beauty is becoming inclusive, we know our daughters won’t cry when we do their natural hair because we now know how to look after natural hair properly. We won’t burn our babies with those harsh chemicals, we will teach them to love every tiny bit of themselves.

Here are some basics things that can help you love your natural hair more:

  • Water is your best friend. You need to drink a lot of water to get healthy hair as well as wet your hair as often as you can. I am not saying you should drench your hair in water till it drips. You can easily get a spray bottle and spray your hair as often as you can. Water is a great source of moisture for your natural hair.
  • Hydrating and steaming go a long way for achieving soft hair.
  • Do everything on your hair wet. You should never comb your hair dry, this causes breakage and you don’t want breakage. If you are going to do twist outs or finger coils please style it wet. Your best friend is damp hair.
  • Avoid heat styling tools. Avoid straighteners, hot combs, blow dryers as much as possible. If you must heat style, ensure you use a protectant or use very low heat. Also, don’t apply only oil on your hair before straightening it. This will cause unrepairable damage to your hair follicles, you may have to shave all of your hair.
  • November 2016
  • Use the L.O.C or L.C.O or L.O.L.C method to retain moisture on your hair. Natural hair should never be without moisture.
    • Liquid, Oil and Cream (L.O.C): After washing and conditioning with sulphate free products, use some liquid detangler to get tangles out, follow with some oil (coconut oil, avocado oil, or olive oil) and apply cream to finalize the process.
    • Liquid, Cream and Oil (L.C.O): After washing and conditioning with sulphate free products, use some liquid detangler to get tangles out, apply cream to your hair (cantu moisturizer, and seal with some oil (coconut oil, avocado oil, or other oils)
    • Liquid, Oil, Leave-in and Cream (L.O.L.C.): This can be used outside of wash days, you start by wetting your hair by spraying water, follow with oil, then leave in conditioner and finally moisturizing cream. This method is the best for moisture retention, it can last a week without touch ups. 
  • Never get bored! Dye your hair, buy accessories, switch up your styles. Take a lot of pictures smiling. Wear wigs, do braids, get a blowout. There is no much to be done, no excuses to be bored.
  • You need to invest in a silk or satin pillowcase or nightcap. Unlike cotton and others, Satin/Silk does not draw moisture out of your hair. Also, it doesn’t cause friction with your hair that can result into breakage.
  • Shrinkage is normal, learn to embrace it. Your hair will shrink and that is a good thing because it indicates a healthy hair. The fact that your natural hair goes back to its normal state after being stretched is a measure of health and strength.
  • Don’t get frustrated when you comb out your hair into a big afro and it has no definition or curls like the girls on Instagram. This is because they put in work to get curls. They often do twist or braid outs or use a variety of plastic curlers to get desired curls. Only a few black women wake up with defined curls, a large chunk of us have to put in the work to get desired curls.
  • Follow natural hair blogs like naturalhairrulesblacknaps and join Facebook groups that celebrate the beauty and journey of natural hair.
  • Lastly, take pictures and smile!
April 2018 Shrinkage :(
Love every single part of yourself. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Don’t ever think anything about you is not enough. You are beautiful enough, don’t let anyone make you think otherwise.

Self-love has very little to do with how you feel about your outer self. It's about accepting all of yourself. - Tyra Banks.

 With love,
Bibi L'amour

Let's talk more, find me on twitter @bibilamour04.


  1. Thanks for these tips!!! So encouraging to me, since I’m a newby. I thought that it was extremely simple and valuable! I have curly hair and it is difficult to take care of it consistently… And if you want to know more about how to take care and Style your hair and how to be new and diverse consistently, simply check my 4C Hair blog


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