Skip to main content

How to find your soulmate

How to find your soulmate

Hi family, thank you so much for clicking this link. It gives me so much joy to see that you enjoy my content. May God continue to bless and encourage you. So today's post was inspired by this prayer someone posted on Twitter and trust your girl, I responded as you can see below.

Some people go through life thinking there is only one person for them. That they must stay in the place of prayers so they don't miss it when it comes to getting married to the person God destined for them to marry. I once asked a lady, what if your soulmate is on the other side of the world or what if they died as a child? What does that mean for you? Does it mean you may never get married? She answered and said, "That is why we're told to pray for God to connect us to our soulmates and bless them with long life". Honestly, I thought that was a very valid prayer and at the same time, I felt sorry for her. I felt sorry for her because she doesn't know that soulmates are made not found.

Soulmates are made not found

The concept of having only one person on earth for you goes against so many things God stands for. For starters, God gave humanity free will. In the most important matter ever (Salvation), He has given everyone the choice to accept or reject Him (John 3:18). If God didn't give us free will, it will be easy to blame Him for everything. I mean, many people still blame him for wars, hunger and a lot more but the truth remains that He gave us free will and He won't change that when it comes to our choice for marriage. If He did not force program accepting the gospel into us, why will He force someone on us? 

We know how God feels about divorce, He is not a big fan of it (Malachi 2:16). If we make a mistake and marry someone God didn't choose for us, we can go back to Him with that as a cause for divorce when we find the said "soulmate". On the flip side, if we marry someone we think is our God-ordained soulmate, it will not be shockproof from marital problems or even divorces because we humans are complex and can decide to build or destroy our marriages with our choices. Whether our spouses are soulmates from God or not.

Just like everything else in our lives, God wants to partner with us and help us make the best choices. From the job you take to the partner you marry and every other thing. God wants intimacy with us when it comes to decision-making. He was to lead us and direct our path so we don't fall into error (Proverbs 3:5-6). For every person you're interested in, talk to God about it. Let God join your vetting committee. Ask Him what He thinks about that person, He will let you know. See as a believer, you're never stranded! You're led by God all the time. It may be through His audible voice, through nudges, through overwhelming peace and many other ways. But you must know that God talks to you. 

There's no one person for anybody

So when it comes to this soul mate thing, there's no one made specifically for you from heaven. I know you may be thinking, so God did not take me out of any man's rib and until I find him I can never be complete. No, you're complete and brought to fullness in Christ and not in man (Colossians 2:10). You were not removed from anybody's ribs, you came into this earth as a result of the reproductive system God beautifully designed. There's no one man or woman for you, you choose them and make them the one.

You pick a person based on God's leading and your preferences then you make them your soulmate. They may not give you butterflies in your bellies at the moment but as you continue to invest love, peace, joy, commitment and everything else into each other you'll watch yourselves blossom into soulmates. What you invest in your marriage is what you get out. 

Remember, you pick one person and stick to them forever. And because we're believers, doesn't mean we're immune from marital hardships but the difference is that we keep yielding to the Holy Spirit and making sure our flesh doesn't take charge of things. Remember, those that are led and continue to submit to God in all ways will not fall into error.

Note; you will always meet more beautiful, richer, more intelligent, and more spiritual people. In fact, some of these people may be your exact spec in comparison to your spouse. But know that the grass is only greener on the other side because it's either fake or because you're not watering your own grass that's why others look greener. When you meet these people in the cause of your life, take it as a reminder to pour a lot more into your marriage and watch it flourish. It's beautiful to be a man or woman of your word. You made a commitment when you married your spouse and you'll need to stick to that forever. 

I hope this has encouraged you! I hope you stop looking for one and start being led in your choices. 

With love,

Bibi Babatunde-Ikotun

P.S In sensitive cases of abuse, marriage is not a do-or-die affair. You're never condemned! 


  1. Thank you Bibi for these words of wisdom. God bless you!


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Story Time: How I got my battle scars (Part 1)

Story Time: How I got my battle scars Hi everyone, welcome back to my blog. I know many of you that have seen me in real life or have seen my pictures have questions about my scars. I'd have questions too if I was in your shoes. To note, putting myself out there like this is new to me but I believe my story will bless and inspire someone. It is a story of victory, deliverance, overcoming tragedy and experiencing God’s intentional love.  Romans 8:28 (TPT) So we are convinced that every detail of our lives is continually woven together to fit into God's perfect plan of bringing good into our lives, for we are his lovers who have been called to fulfil his designed purpose. On the 24th of March, 2012 my life changed forever. As the secretary of the History and International Studies student association at Babcock University (2012), I was part of the planning process for the annual departmental field trip. I woke up bright and early ready to face a wonderfu

What does it mean to be complete in Christ?

What does it mean to be complete in Christ? When you look at yourself, what do you see? Do you see someone who is imperfect and lacking in many areas? Do you sometimes find yourself thinking these thoughts? God is angry with me. I’m too dirty and damaged for Him to accept me. Why would God want to be with me when I’m a hot mess. Let me give you a secret, it doesn't matter how you feel or what you think. All that matters is what God has said in His word. His word says you are Complete in Christ! You are whole! Nothing missing, nothing lost, nothing broken! This is not by your deeds or something you are on your own. This is because you're in Christ!  Are you in Christ? Colossians 2:9-10 (NKJV) For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead [a]bodily; 10 and you are complete in Him, who is the head of all [b]principality and power. Colossians 2:9-10 (TPT) For he is the complete fullness of deity living in human form. 10 And our own completeness is now found in him . We are co

How I got my battle scars (Part 2)

How I got my battle scars (Part 2) I want to start by saying a big thank you to everyone that reached out to me after my last post on how I got my battle scars , please read my last post before reading this one . The overwhelming love and encouragement I received from everyone blew my mind. Thank you so much for it all, thank you! Like I promised, here is the part 2 of this story. Isaiah 41:10 "Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand." March 22nd, 2012. After receiving emergency treatment, I was put in a corner to be picked up by my family. My friends had reached out to my older sisters (they both lived in the UK at the time) about the accident. They were scared and did not know how to inform my parents, at last, they passed the information to my dad. My dad was out of town, so he reached out to his friend who lived around