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How to love when it seems hard

How to love when it seems hard

by Toyosi Adegunle

“You can’t give what you don’t have” is a popular phrase that is mostly used to describe the inability to express a character or trait. When people are unable to love, forgive, or show kindness, it might be due to the fact that they don’t have it which means they never experienced it first-hand from the people around them, they’ve never really seen it play out hence they can exactly show it to other people.  Is there anything that you haven’t experienced, hence can’t give? Surely, there might be a lot of that, but the love of God I believe is not one of them. You can give love because you have it, in abundance in fact. 

“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.” - I John‬ ‭4:7‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

I randomly say “I have a lot of love in me to give and show” which is the truth because it’s plenty where it comes from - my heart, where the love of God is shed abroad; and it’s the same for you, a believer, a child of God with the image and likeness of God. If you're not saved, it's very easy to be saved so you can tap into this love. Learn more here. To know and have God is to know love. The knowledge of God you have and the presence of the spirit of God in you enables you to love other people just as God loves you because how else would you truly know how to love? The more you grow in love with God, the easier it becomes to be able to love other people regardless of their race, colour, gender, background, personality or religion. 

Loving God

Is there a process to loving God? Is there a way to know you love God? Is there a way to measure how much you love God? How do you grow in love with God? So many questions come to mind when you think about Loving God. I think of perfection when I think of God. You can love God for many reasons that can equally cause you to love God a little less if for any purpose, those ‘reasons’ cease to exist. God loves unconditionally and that's the key to loving God right back and loving people as well. No conditions, no limitations. 

Despite your shortcomings and inconsistencies, God is always there. This fact intrigues me a lot - how you can make a mistake more than once and maybe twice and it's never held against you. It's giving faithfulness, really. To love God is to walk in the path of righteousness, totally obey his very words and prompts, study the Word, pray and talk to God constantly. These are a few of the ways to grow in love with God, not because of anything material or ‘selfish’ but because he is God and he loved you first.

“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”- Romans‬ ‭5:8‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Loving others 

Love is the highest expression of God to humanity. Love is the reason for this journey, this walk with God, fellowshipping, studying, everything. If you’re not giving love, you’re not really giving. If love is not the reason, then it’s not it. 

“And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.” - ‭‭I Corinthians‬ ‭13:3‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

Loving others the God-way is proof that you have and are experiencing the love of God in and out, and you are constantly growing in love with God. It’s a very sweet cycle. Stay in love with God, learn of his love and ways, and show it to people. 

“Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away.” - I Corinthians‬ ‭13:4-8‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

This scripture simply breaks down what it means to love others. The word of God and the spirit of God alive in you guides you daily on how to love people in different circumstances. It can be tough loving others the same way God loves you even when it seems like they don’t deserve it but hey! You won’t ever run out of giving and showing love to other people because you have a lot of it to give. God has given you the power and strength to love even when it is not convenient. Truthfully, it won’t always be convenient and easy to do but always trust God in the process and be intentional about the way you love people around you - the God way 🤍.

Check out the most recent video on Bibi's youtube channel, would you? 


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